Two years ago today is the day our lives changed direction forever, before we even knew it. After a two cycle hiatus from trying to get pregnant, we were finally able to inseminate for May’s cycle. We were so relieved, so excited, yet nervous, anxious. We wanted it to work so badly but at the same time we were terrified – what if it does work?!
Our whole lives were going to change and we were scared of that, but it was a good scared, like waiting at the top of a roller coaster before the big drop. At the end of the ride you’re smiling and laughing and all THAT WAS AWESOME! but that moment of hesitation seizes you at the top, where you’re looking down the rails at the twists and turns to come, second-guessing yourself and the choice you made that brought you to the precipice. A heartbeat later and the brakes release and you’re zooming down the hill and twisting, turning, looping, and finally come racing to a halt at the station, heart pounding and hair windblown. A wild ride, scary but fun, and worth the long wait in line.
I can’t imagine our lives without Jaxson, crazy twists and turns and all. And today is the day that it all began, the day our baby boy began to grow in Mama J’s belly, and in our hearts. 🙂