Beginning Again

Note: I was somewhat nervous to post this publicly for now because a part of me can’t believe we are finally starting down this road and I didn’t want to “jinx” it. However, I didn’t leave anything out when J was going through this process and I don’t want to leave anything out during my experience. Warning: loads of optimism and excitement ahead! 

All week I’ve been full of nervousness and anxiety, excitement and anticipation. On Monday I finally got through to the RE’s office and scheduled my initial consult/new patient setup for today, Thursday. The days have been dragging by at a glacial pace this week, but finally, we’ve arrived. I had to pinch myself – THIS IS IT.

I felt so guilty when I had been absent for J’s initial consult last time around because I had to work, so I was really grateful that she could come with me today. That, and knowing how I already am with doctor’s visits (I forget what I want to ask and what they say because I get so nervous), I liked having her there to make sure I didn’t miss anything. Plus, I had a migraine this morning and my medication for that makes me kind of….stupid. LOL Despite all of that, I really wanted not only her ears and memory but also her support – after all, we are doing this together and she wanted to be there. Of course, we’ve been through this process before when she was the baby-maker, but now she gets to go through it again as the non-baby-maker. Everything that she can be a part of, I want her to experience so she can relax and enjoy it this time around. It’s a much different view from the non-baby-maker side of the stirrups!

I left work early and met J at Starbucks before we headed up to the doctor’s office. We arrived right on time at 2 and filled out a few extra forms they hadn’t had online and within 10 minutes we were back with the nurse. She went over my medical history and took my blood pressure (104/80) and weight (218). She remembered us from when J was undergoing treatment so of course we had to brag about Jax and share pictures. She was so excited we were back for round 2.

She led us to the conference room and in a minute Dr. C came in. We sat and discussed my medical history extensively, he reviewed my labs and ultrasounds from September and said everything there looked okay. He was pleased we’d been dieting and exercising and losing weight and didn’t even mention that I needed to lose more before getting pregnant. He seemed genuinely excited for us and was much more relaxed and at ease than I remember him being previously, so that was great too. After reviewing all of my information, he asked if both of us had been there for the psych evaluation last time (yes) and if we’d picked a donor (yes). He closed my file and gave us this plan:

  • He gave us the option of doing an HSG or not, since I didn’t really have any risk factors nor did I ever have abdominal or reproductive surgery in the past. I opted not to do it at this time, and would do it later if we were having trouble getting pregnant.
  • He let us know to go ahead and order the sperm and have it shipped to their office.
  • He sent me for labs tonight to check for infectious diseases & STD’s and to check my A1C, AMH, and cystic fibrosis status, which needed a whopping 13 vials of blood!
  • I had a quick pelvic exam and STD cultures taken – fun. Not.
  • He gave me a prescription for 200 mg of Prometrium to take for the next 5 days to induce a period within the next two weeks. (See this post for a good laugh!)
  • Once I get my period, I have to come in for an ultrasound and lab work to check my baseline information and make sure I don’t have any cysts present.
  • Depending on how the ultrasound and those labs look, I’ll start Clomid or Letrozole (I think I’m going to go with Clomid) and possibly injectable hormones to make my eggs develop well, ending with an HCG trigger shot to force ovulation.
  • And then we’ll go in for the IUI. Yes, you read that right…

WE’RE INSEMINATING IN DECEMBER!!

I never thought we would walk in there and come out with a plan to start trying next month. I figured I’d be doing a forced cycle with tons of blood work like J had to do, and then we’d come up with a plan. Plus we’d heard they didn’t do inseminations in December, so we were prepared to start in January or later, and we were shocked when he told us we could start right away. In fact, we had to ask him to repeat that because we weren’t sure we had heard him right. J told me my face turned bright red, which indicates embarrassment or in this case, being overwhelmed or surprised. I know I’ve said it before, that we kept feeling like The Powers That Be were telling us to wait to start this process until December for some reason – not necessarily “we’re going to get pregnant in December” but stop trying to rush to do it before then – and we put our faith in that feeling that December was important and to be patient for it. Sure enough, here we are, looking at a possible December insemination! Our faith and trust in the Universe seems to have paid off.

I am: Excited! Nervous! Scared! Anxious! J and I stayed up until 1 AM talking about everything and digesting all the information, and I’m fully at ease. J said she was having a little trouble getting excited, because she was worried about all the what-if’s (plus we’ve been watching Grey’s Anatomy lately and all sorts of terrifying baby/birth stuff goes down on that show all. the. time.). I’m not stressing because I’ve seen our future child in visions before, so has J, and I told her to keep the faith, and trust in the same Powers That Be that have led us to December. Obviously they’ve got an eye out on us! We both know that our next child is out there waiting for the right time to come to us, and having that faith makes all of this a little less scary.

I’m ready, and so incredibly thankful that this is finally happening. I’ve always wanted to carry a baby, and am so glad that the time has come for that to happen.

We want to go visit the fertility statues in Orlando again soon for some good luck conceiving. It’s kind of cool to be able to go back with Jaxson and say “Thanks for helping us get this wonderful, amazing child, now let’s do it again!!” 🙂

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